Bridesmaids..is 6 too many

I am having such trouble picking bridesmaids. I really want to have 5 as my fiance is having 5 groomsmen and I am happy with my 5 that I have picked but I have another very close friend that I am maybe just not quite as close to as the others I have picked.
I am hoping she will be ok with it but I am so scared of hurting her feelings and I would rather just ask her than have our friendship be affected. What do you think you would do? There is the cost as well as feeling that the pictures may look ridiculous. I was planning to say to her before that I would love to have her if I could’ve had more bridesmaids but I just couldn’t pick another but is that making it worse?
I am really stuck

 

My niece had 14! Bridesmaids, so I’d say 6 is fine

She did stipulate that they all paid for their dresses and shoes etc. They looked lovely, each in matching midi dresses from Miss Selfridge at approximately £60 each,

 

It seems a bit silly. Can't you just have 2 and get the others to do other bits?

 

It's okay but it is reminiscent of those massive American weddings! If it's what you want, go for it.

 

If you're having 5, one more makes no difference

 

For this reason I had family only. Couldn’t possibly have chosen between friends.

But I’d say include her. Six or five, doesn’t make any difference and it sounds like it’ll make you both happy!

 

For this reason I had family only. Couldn’t possibly have chosen between friends.

But I’d say include her. Six or five, doesn’t make any difference and it sounds like it’ll make you both happy!

We are having around 100 so it’s a relatively small wedding

 

If you're having 5, one more makes no difference

This. It's a bit like saying "I have 5 kids, should we have a 6th?". It makes little difference to the expense, craziness, sized-up transport etc.

FWIW I would keep it at 1 or 2 and ask stbDH to do the same, especially as you only have 100 guests. With your numbers of bridesmaids and groomsmen and once both sets of parents are added, your wedding party forms 15% of the attendees (assuming the 100 doesn't include yourselves and you don't also have DCs or step parents to add to the wedding party, in which case the %age is even higher!). This seems very unbalanced. Put the money you save on suits and bridesmaids dresses behind the bar for all to benefit from.

 

Don’t compare to the number of groomsmen, nobody will care about that. Only have people as your bridesmaids if you genuinely want them to be part of your special day, to be getting ready with you in the morning, to be helping organise your hen do, to be in all the photos. They have a job to do and you have to be able to rely on them to make your day as stress free as possible.

My wedding was smaller than yours (60) - DH had no groomsmen (not even a best man) and I had 1 MOH, 2 bridesmaids and 1 flower girl (my niece, MOH’s daughter).

Research the costs involved - if you want more people, think about whether you can afford to have them all looking the same. Factor in the cost of dresses, shoes, hair, make up etc. For mine, I paid for dresses and hair, and they got their own shoes and did their own makeup (me paying for their makeup would have been another £50 each).

So, ultimately it’s up to you, but be sensible.

 

Oh and one more tip: unless you already have, don’t ask them too early in the planning process - you never know what will happen and you might need to be flexible, especially considering you both want so many people. People behave weirdly around weddings and you might find it a lot less stressful to wait until you’re a few of months out before finalising the wedding party.

 

It’s your wedding, do whatever the heck you fancy!

 

Sorry another thing to consider! Think about where you’re getting ready - I was going to get ready in a hotel then realised there wouldn’t be a space big enough for us all to get ready together unless I paid out for a huge suite, so another cost to factor in. So in the end everyone stayed at my house and we got ready there - paying for transport from ours was cheaper than paying for the hotel room. More bridal party members = more space required, more transport required, more hotel rooms possibly, etc.

 

I am thinking now I may just have 3, my childhood best friend and sisters and then my other friends won’t be offended as my childhood friend is not connected to the rest if that makes sense. Thanks for all advice

 

I am thinking now I may just have 3, my childhood best friend and sisters and then my other friends won’t be offended as my childhood friend is not connected to the rest if that makes sense. Thanks for all advice

Sounds like an excellent plan!